It's hard to find positivity in a pool of cynicism. Where I work for every positive thought there are five cynical ones. Among people who feel no joy in their work because they've been beaten down or saw their chosen profession as a means to an end. It's hard to keep a positive outlook on a profession you were excited to join ,when you feel just as beaten down and fight to not join the cynicism.
It's a fight to maintain an outlook of positivity, it's a fight to maintain the identity I worked to find. For all the steps I've taken forward I feel like I've fallen behind. Maybe it's environmental as I've been told, or possibly old patterns repeating themselves. I keep fighting, but I know I'm losing myself again.
I just need to dig deep and pull myself out.
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